He was here just a few minutes ago, where did he go now? I need to find him before he disappears from my home, forever.
“Andrew, when I talk to you, you look at my face. Is that clear?”
“Mom, I was listening, alright? Besides, you give me this lecture everyday, so I know it off by heart. Thank you for your time.”
“Andrew…rew…” Her fading sound waves tailed me as I swiftly ran into the resounding silence.
I was welcomed into the teenage world by the same routine over and over again; she doesn’t listen to me and vise versa. I liberate and the last stage in this drama- she bangs hard on the piece of wood that divides our two distinct worlds.
“Andrew? Open the door, we need to talk”!
” I need some time to myself”.
Where are you when I needed you the most? God, I know you have given him to me, but I lost him. Where do I find him now? Yes, I know just what to do.
“Mom, I am going out for a walk. I will have dinner, so don’t wait for me.” I slam the door and step out into the silent street. Finally! Out from hell.
I am quite certain every family invites him to their homes daily, so I’m just going to wait until my parents invite him. After all, it’s their fault! They try to control my life. They don’t understand that I am a teen and that I am capable of doing things myself. They never, ever, let me take decisions myself. So, I’m not responsible if he leaves the house, my parents are. However, I liked his company a few years ago, so I’m going to search for him.
I look out for him as I walked down the street that entertains young life.
I haven’t seen him for a long time now. Not in the nightclub or bar. Not in the basketball court or McD. Not here, neither here… I have covered every place and I’m exhausted right now. I guess this is one of the few times I am allowed to give up.
“Young boy. You seem to be looking for someone”.
I turned around to see an old man, probably in his late seventies.
“I’m not sure if you can find him for me but I guess you could help me out. I am looking for peace. Ever since I entered my teens, I am not able to find him at home. I remember the good times when he was with us. How happy my parents were. How happy I was. I’m not even able to describe him anymore, that’s how long it has been. I blame my parents for this. They are the ones who tell me off and I hate the fact that they are in control of me, and my dreams. I’m sorry; I don’t know how he looks like. It’s not of any use is it? Sigh…”
“My dear boy. I am glad you are making this mistake now because you will be able to lead a happier life. Let me take you somewhere and I will share my story as we walk. I grew up in an environment worse than yours. My father was an alcoholic. He used to come home drunk everyday and abuse my mother and me. Eventually, I managed to study well and get out of hell. All my life I blamed my father for pushing peace out of our house and I carried that blame and hatred with me. In my journey, I learned many lessons, one being where to find peace”.
The man slowed down as we reached our destination. I glanced up to see a spiral tower with a metal cross ( A place I instantly recognized).
“I asked everyone around me where to find him and finally I asked the right person, God. I read through his powerful words and I realized that- what we are all probably looking for is close to us. It is in our hearts, lad. You don’t have to search for him anywhere else. He lives within us and comes from us. Peace is beautiful. It is happy, truthful, hopeful, full of love, mercy and forgiveness, and it is bound with Jesus’s blood, the great sacrifice. I would have been in peace if I forgave my father and moved on. But no, I decided to carry the burden with me, and that is where I lost him. My son, don’t wait for someone else to give you peace. Only God can, and he wants us to spread it. Go home with peace in you. Make peace with your parents. Be grateful you have parents who care for you and know that God appoints them as your caretakers. Good-bye. God be with you and bless you”.
I finally opened my eye after the old man (whose name I don’t even know) introduced me to peace, who is ready to live with me if I invite him. God sends Angels to tell messages; I guess he was one of them. I hurried home, because, this time I knew he was with me.
Be at peace!